The Chapman family found themselves in the midst of a horrific tragedy in 2008. The depth of the valley they must have traveled through is likely unimaginable to anyone who has never experienced the loss of their 5-year-old child in an almost surreal accident.
Choosing to SEE is written by Mary Beth Chapman, wife of Steven Curtis Chapman of contemporary Christian music fame. Mary Beth exposes her family’s painful journey through a raw and real reflection of her family’s biography, the tragedy, and the journey through the pain.
The one thing that seems to encompass this read is hope in the goodness of God. The confusion involved with losing a family member will always summon up questions from within directed toward God. Why did this happen? How is this your will? Through the hardship, the Chapmans have endured continuing to place their trust in Him who works all things together for good for those who love God and are called to His purpose.
Before the accident, their daughter had written the word “SEE” on a card. This seemed pretty random to the family because it was not one of the words that she would normally have would have practiced writing. This word, SEE, seems to become a sign of hope for the family. Choosing to SEE is about trusting God when He doesn’t make sense to us. It’s about SEEing the signs of His goodness. One of the Chapman boys, Caleb, said it this way:
“The only analogy I can come up with is this: it’s like God is an abstract artist…and when you’re real close to a painting like this, it’s hard to focus, it’s blurred, and you can’t see what’s going on. You have to walk really far back, and then the whole painting comes into focus and you can see what the artist was doing. That’s what this experience is like for us. We’re just really, really close to this mess… but I think the farther we get away from it in time, the more we’re going to see this picture come into focus. Man, it’s a really big one too, so we’ll have to walk pretty far away.”
I love one of the quotes about pain by Dr. Larry Crabb, which was included in this book:
“Shattered dreams are never random. They are always a piece in a larger puzzle, a chapter in a larger story. The Holy Spirit uses the pain of shattered dreams to help us discover our desire for God, to help us begin dreaming the highest dream. They are ordained opportunities for the Spirit to awaken, then to satisfy our highest dream.” -Dr. Larry Crabb
This book goes through the sequence of events starting with a brief overview of Mary Beth’s early years, meeting her husband, starting a family, supporting her husband’s musical aspirations, adopting kids from China, becoming public advocates for adoption, the tragedy, picking up the pieces, and Mary Beth’s blog posts in in reflecting on her loss.
This is an emotional read. Pain affects everyone, even the family of a respected singer/songwriter. Seeing how they pressed on through a world of hurt, (not without being frustrated with God, but continuing to trust Him regardless) only elevated my respect for this family.
